Inconsistency is an opportunity

You’re inconsistent. 

You think and act in ways that fail to mesh with your values in principles. 

Not just you, but all of us are walking and talking hypocrites. 

But that’s not the whole story. 

The rest of the story is that each time you catch yourself living inconsistently with your values is an opportunity. 

An opportunity to:

• change,
• correct course,
• confess,
• ask forgiveness, and
• begin again. 

Of course, it’s also an opportunity to:

• bow up,
• double down,
• give up,
• quit, and
• blame.

Hypocrisy isn’t the end of your story. It’s an intimate and defining part of it. 

How you respond to your inconsistencies will go a long long way towards determining what happens in your life. 

Choose the first set of responses rather than the second. 

They are hard and uncomfortable steps to take but lead to healing, hope, and happiness in the end. 

Most of all, they lead to growth and your best self.  

Attitude Over Circumstances

The quality of your life and character isn’t determined by circumstances external to you—the things that happen to you. Both are determined by the internal choices and decisions you make in light of them. 

Which is good news because you can actually do something about them. 

“It is not as important to change our circumstances,” Tim Keller says, “as it is to change our heart’s attitude and stance toward them.” 

Your attitude is the key to turning even the worst situation around. How you think drives everything else. 

It’s easy to have a positive attitude when things are going well. But it’s a different story when they’re not. Those are the moments you need encouragement from a good friend. I want to be that good friend for you today, and remind you of a few things. 

Every situation (good or bad) has the potential to shape and impact you for the better. It might be hard and nearly impossible to get through, but it can make you tougher, stronger, and better if you’ll let it. The mental game is always the hardest part of any battle. Staying positive and upbeat when the waves are crashing about you is perhaps the most difficult thing you face on a regular basis. 

When things aren’t going well, I want you to remember what good things it could mean for you. Opportunities to grow and learn. Opportunities to be a better version of yourself today than you were yesterday. Opportunities that remind you why you’re here in the first place.

Check your thoughts the next time you find yourself in the damp dark pit of self-pity. Remind yourself that you’ve still got gas in the tank and some fight left in you. You’re not that easy to beat. You will never quit. You’re tough enough to hang in there and find the silver lining to even the darkest cloud. A silver lining that keeps you pushing forward and driving on when things are at their lowest. 

One Sure Fire Way to Accomplish More in 2016

As we bring 2015 to a close and stand ready to welcome 2016 with open arms, I want to share one small tip that can help you achieve more next year. 

Don't wait until the calendar changes to start working on your goals.

Get a head start on them now.

The momentum you build these next few days before we turn the page on a new year can propel you into achieving more than you ever thought you could.

We often over estimate what we can accomplish in the short term, but rarely do we realize fully what we can achieve over the long term. 

Go into the new year energized and excited to tackle all you hope to accomplish. And while your at it give yourself a head start while you can.

I started attacking my 2016 reading list this past weekend and have been over joyed to have already completed my first book on the list.

What are your big goals for 2016 and who said you had to wait until then to start working on them? 

Hard Conversations

We live in a broken, fallen world full of strife, difficulty and disagreement. We don't always get along with or agree with those around us. Maybe someone has done something that has hurt you financially, emotionally, or otherwise. You might feel bitter and you might be wounded, but things don't have to stay that way. 

Often the conversations you most dread are the ones you most need to have. There is something deep down inside us that knows exactly what we need to do. That feeling of dread or fear may not mean what you have always thought. Those knots in your stomach might not be telling you to run, but just might be confirming what you need to do. Whatever conversation has you scared, run towards it. Sure things could blow up in your face and go badly, but being willing to lean in and engage in tough conversations just might lead to outcomes you've only dreamed of.   

Tough conversations don't have to be negative or destructive. It can actually serve as an opportunity to strengthen your relationships and help you grow as an individual. If for no other reason, lean in and engage those you most fear. It has the potential to completely change everything. If you think about it in these terms, those tough conversations all of a sudden get a whole lot easier. 

Ok, you know you need to have a tough conversation but you aren't sure how. Here are a few quick hits that can help you master the art of the difficult conversation. 

Prepare your heart. This is the most challenging part of any difficult interchange. Before going to the other person pause and take a look at yourself. Search your own attitudes, words and actions. Many times you'll find that you've contributed far more to the relational strife your experiencing than you previously realized. Taking a swim in your own stuff will better prepare you to talk to someone else about theirs.

Plan out what you will say. Scripting your conversation may be impractical however, it is extremely helpful to spend some time processing not only what you will say but how you will say it. While the content of your message is important, method and tone are even more so. A helpful way to address tone and method is by how you would like to be confronted. One golden rule that won't steer you wrong is to be humble. A humble attitude smooths over a lot more than you realize. 

Your Not in Control

You want to be in control. You desire control over your surroundings and over all your outcomes in life so you work hard and put in long hours. Sleepless nights and caffine are the rent you pay and rent is due every day.

Hustling is important. One of the many traits that turns up time after time when studying the successful is that they run at a different pace than everyone else around them. In short, they hustle. No matter the field and no matter the role get after it. 

To acheive your dreams and accomplish your goals, you are going to have to work extremely hard but be careful not to buy the lie that everything rests within your grasp. 

You can't force results. No matter how many hours you put in or how hard you work you can't force success to happen. Many things are beyond your control. You can do everything right and the deal still doesn't go your way and that's okay. As I've said before, the power is in the process.   

You are responsible for the process. You are accoutable for doing your part. Do the things that accompany success. Order your habits, attidudes, and character. Show up early, remain diligent and stay late if you need you, but remember that those things are just part of the process.  

Find rest in your limits. Labor hard and hustle but also rest in the knowldege that results are ultimately outside your control. There is a certain level of peace that comes from knowing that you have given your all. Give your all and lay it all on the line every day and you'll be able to hold your head high whether the results come or not.